- Get called a slut by Rush Limbaugh.
- Have my smart phone hacked and private videos and/or photos are “leaked.”
- Release a track with Lil’ Wanye
- Create a quasi-fashionable shoe line.
I’m 25 and I just realized right this moment that I suck. I’m thinking about my evening, about how happy I’ll be to make dinner, play with my pet rabbit, and get to bed around 9:30, maybe 10. The thing is, eletro-noise-awesomley-hip-pop duo Sleigh Bells is coming into town tonight. On a Tuesday night. On a work night. And to make things more hip (or worse), Diplo is one of the opening acts. It’s hit me like a bad case of indigestion, I’m officially boring. I would rather stay home and do the aforementioned rather then going out, getting crazy, and generally acting a like a hip, cool, young adult.It’s just not worth the mental anguish (and the light vomiting) in the morning to get myself out of bed and into work. I will not be wearing my hip asymmetrical see through top with acid wash jeggings and vintage style lace up boots. I will be laying in bed, wearing pimple cream on my face watching episodes of Modern Family. I’m okay with this. I think.
Last weeks episode was a mess. And when I say mess I mean delightfully disgusting piece of entertainment. Kimbella, the show punching bag, got into another fight with some girl who also happens to have a false sense of importance. But among the violence, we found love. Ol’ jmmy finally got muscled into proposing to Chrissy in Miami.
During last weeks Baseball Wives…who am I kidding? I don’t watch Baseball Wives. I stick to the minority themed shows because they make me feel more comfortable. But VH1 doesn’t really cater to my specific minority (the Hispanic community) so I’m proposing the creation of Fútbol Wives, or possibly, Fútbol Esposas. This show can follow the same formulaic design of its baseball, basketball, mob, and hip hop predecessors:
I hope that Vh1 will consider bringing a little diversity to their shows. Hey, maybe the Logo channel can take on Softball Wives?